In the realm of relationships, it's often the small, seemingly insignificant moments that hold the most profound significance. For me, one such moment occurred during a 2,500km bike ride from Venice to Athens. As we pedaled through the landscapes, I began to realize that the challenges we faced on the road mirrored the complexities of life itself, and that marriage, perhaps, wouldn't be the hardest thing we'd do.
I met Dat in San Francisco in 2015, a specialized nurse with a calming presence that immediately drew me in. Our relationship blossomed amidst the chaos of building my Mongolian vodka business, and we moved quickly, spending a lot of time together. When Trump's election shook the US, we decided to leave and try Australia, taking over the Broadwater resort in Busselton. Covid hit, and we worked and lived together 24/7, a test that many relationships wouldn't survive.
In 2023, after five intense years at the resort, we needed a break. I wanted to buy a catamaran and sail around the world, but Dat couldn't swim. So, we landed on another challenge: a cycling tour from Venice to Athens. Dat, who didn't know how to ride, fell off within minutes on our first outing. But, instead of giving up, he blamed me, cheekily asked for $5 to get back on, and finished the ride.
The ride was amazing but extremely challenging. One day in Albania, it was 37C, we had about 130km to ride, and the wind was in our faces. We were hot, dirty, and running out of water, but Dat didn't complain. He's one of those people who, once he's made up his mind, will do something no matter how hard it is.
After the ride, we stopped in Hokkaido, Japan, moving very, very slowly. One afternoon, we ended up at Whisky Bar Tasokare, a tiny, dimly lit six-seat bar. Over a Kanosuke single malt and a whisky cocktail, we started talking about the trip, replaying everything we'd been through. It was a real test, but we got through it without arguments, swearing at the hills, not each other.
Somewhere during those drinks, it clicked. After riding thousands of kilometres, navigating foreign countries, and spending basically every waking hour together, marriage probably wouldn't be the hardest thing we'd do. There wasn't a big proposal, just a decision we made. We embraced and told Ms Maki, the bar owner, who was thrilled.
We got married in 2024 at the Broadwater down by the beach, with family and friends who flew in from all over the world. My son, Travis, was our celebrant. During the ceremony, Dat surprised me by saying he was taking my surname, so he could share a name with Travis. It was beautiful, and there were lots of tears and a big party with a drag queen.
Being married feels more grounded and real, like we're even more of a team. We stepped away from the day-to-day at the Broadwater about a year ago and now live in Cottesloe with our rescue dog, Harvey. Cycling is still a big part of our lives, and we've done rides in Norway, France, and Australia. Through it all, we've always had each other's backs.
In the grand scheme of things, the bike ride was a metaphor for life. It taught us that the hardest things we face are often the ones we grow the most from. Marriage, in many ways, is just another challenge, and one that we're ready to tackle together.
